A shaky proposal

I know it's a long journey. But we can make it through.

Counting one streetlight after another, till we reach the big bright light in the end.

Wont say this is the first line I have written this for you,

Wont say this is the first time I have tried to tell you this,

Wont even say this is the last time I might do this.

Every word in this has a story to tell,

and It had to die multiple time and be reborn in the hands of my pen,

my shaky pen to finally be here.

Every word will scream something out to you. But please, don't be afraid.

Hear them out, because they have a job to do.

A job I envy,

Envy because the only thing they have to do is just convey and fade away,

And not be there to see what comes after that.

I guess that's where I come in.

It frightens me, scares me.

No matter what the reply is,

I can only take it with a little bit of fear in me.

But better fear than regret.

Don't want to say one day, the tears I shed, are for you and you were not there to wipe it off.

Don't want to know one day, the hands that should have rested in mine, should have been yours and its far off.

Don't want to see one day, you walking from a distance and not towards me.

I...We... can be together, If we want us to be. I want us to be.

Everything in me, everything right now, every damn thing that is pushing me in writing this is not my brain, I know that for sure. I hope you get to see it too.

Don't know what.

Don't know why.

Don't even want to know what and why.

I cant explain the feelings that's going through me right now.

Shaky hands and a pounding heart, that's what the result is.

I...........We..........Us.........l hope you understand and let us be.